Our God On The Mountain & In The Valley

My face flushed. My heart started pounding. I felt my body temperature rise. Sweating, rapid breathing, stomach upset, and shaking seized my body once again. I knew it was coming. I've been there before. Another anxiety attack seemingly coming from out of nowhere. I loathe them. I loathe how they make me feel and the mental, physical and emotional toll they take on my body. I honestly wouldn't wish anxiety attacks on my worst enemy.

For 9 long years I've tried everything under the sun to get rid of these things. Medicine, therapy, essential oils, yoga, meditation, exercise, tea, etc., you name it, I've probably tried it. It's tempting to think that these will always be a part of my life. Sometimes, the day after a severe anxiety attack is filled with a lot of emotional and physical pain. It’s filled with questions, frustration, and, tears. It often brings comparison, depression, hurt, and confusion The easiest thing to do would be to surrender and accept that this is just who I am. But, it's not, nor ever will be.

God didn't design us to have anxiety. God didn't design us to have anxiety attacks. He did design us with what is commonly known as "fight or flight" but that was only for us to use in real danger. He did give us an "alarm system" that pumps adrenaline, cortisol, and other hormones into our body that allows us to fight threats. But, we're not meant to always operate in that realm.

Recently, I was told “your misery is your ministry.” Wow. There was something about that statement that hit me. My ministry might not be huge. I may not have a large following or top fans. But, that’s not what ministry is about. It’s about sharing the good, bad, and ugly, and glorifying God through it all. As my friend, Sherry Anne so profoundly sings,"For the God on the mountain is still God in the valley. When things go wrong, He'll make them right. And the God of the good times, is still God in the bad times. The God of the day is still God in the night." (linking the video to this amazing song below)

A ministry is about spreading the Gospel, sharing what only God can do, and walking through your trials and tests and letting God turn them into testimonies. It’s about reaching out and touching just one person, and praying that the Spirit works through you to bring someone to Christ. It’s about learning to be like the apostle Paul and understanding how to be content in ALL circumstances.

2 Corinthians 12: 7-10 says: "Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

It's quite possible that anxiety attacks may be the “thorn in my flesh.” Like Paul, I’ve prayed,I've pleaded, I've begged God to take these things away. But, God revealed to me this verse above the other night. I will boast about my weaknesses because the power of Christ is stronger. His power in me can overcome and conquer anything. In Christ, I’m more than a conqueror. In Christ, I am the head and not the tail, the salt of the earth, and loved beyond anything I could ever imagine.

If you struggle with anxiety, fear, depression, or any other obstacle that wants to chain you down, know that there is One who can and will set you free. There's One who never abandons you, never leaves or forsakes you, unconditionally loves you, suffered and died to save you, and promises to give you peace in any storm. God didn't promise a life without troubles. Jesus Himself said: "in this world, you will have trouble. But, take heart! I have overcome the world." John 16:33. But, God in His loving kindness and everlasting mercy promises that He will be with us through it all. He hears our prayers. He hears our hearts. He will never leave us alone.

Lord, thank You for not abandoning me in my anxiousness. Thank You that I get to come to You to ground me and anchor me in Your truth and love. Thank you for holding my hand through the most challenging, difficult & darkest moments. Thank you, Father for delivering me, sheltering me, and strengthening me. How I’m humbled with gratitude for the revelations You bless me with & how much love You have for me. Thank you, Father for being the God on the mountain and in the valley.

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